Corporeality

Sitting, numb... holding away thoughts. Praying tomorrow brings something bright. My day was shattered by the illusion of a successful day... crying again... after I thought I couldn't cry anymore. Turns out to not be the truth. This time, I can't lie to myself. I have to believe what I believe and move on. I hurt, but it's going to make me better. I just don't what to do this time, everything is different. The future is as bright as you make it, the present isn't gloomy enough to make me want the rain, it's just gray. Purgatory traps the lost souls that leave Earth. What if I never left? What's a lost soul trapped on Earth called? It can't be lost if you know where you are. Mostly drained of energy. Once again I feel that something has been ripped from me. I don't feel it, I know it. My head hurts, and dulls the pain in my heart, but then reminds me of why I hurt in the first place. All I ask is for the right comfort I just don't know where to look. There's a point after avoiding a mirror, that once you look at you're reflection you're shocked. Right now, i'm having a hard time seeing anything. I'm fading into a pit of the down trodden. But corporealization comes with inner knowledge. Only I can make the changes to reappear.